愛我

爱我 - Work-in-ProgressTears tickled down my cheeks as I envisioned this painting in my head before I even lifted my pencil. I think I can understand why there’s such a long list of great masters who ended up going crazy. No, I’m not comparing myself to them, I won’t dare to. I just do sincerely believe I understand how the insanity began for them. I’m probably at the first stage of insanity, at this moment.

Note to my friends:
If I swear off sex, stop shaving my armpits and legs and start gardening as a hobby, please send me to a psychiatrist IMMEDIATELY.

When I get emotional, I sketch my feelings out. When I sketch, I end up getting emotional as well. This equation applies to this painting, 愛我.

愛我 (pronounced “eye war”) means “Love me” in Chinese. I wasn’t listening to that played-too-death song by Colin Raye but I was singing to the same tune. Maybe a little off-pitch, but still the same tune. Let me dabble in a little bit of creative rationale here for 愛我 ok?

  • Love, or 愛 in Chinese, is an exceptionally interesting Chinese character to study.
  • To begin understanding the word Love, one must literally start at the “heart” of the word – 心 (pronounced “sin”) This character is the pictograph of a heart, which symbolizes not just the tangible organ, but also emotions, the mind and the soul. It is the basis of the word 愛 in the Chinese language.
  • The 心 is distorted in the painting to represent confusion in Love. The myriad of inverted hearts clinging on to the ends at the top of Love symbolizes the complexity of Love. The innumerable Black strands spilling in all directions at the bottom of Love warns of how Love can be the roots of all evil, if one’s not careful. The duotone choice of colors, Red and Black, serve as a reminder that while Love gives Life, it also gives Death. The migration of both colors right below the word 心 illustrates the fragile thin line where one may find it difficult to determine if Love gives happiness or sadness.

Not bad eh, coming from a C-grade Chinese student? I have a fairly decent knowledge behind the meanings of some Chinese characters only because once upon a time ago, I was learning Chinese calligraphy from one of the best Chinese calligraphers in Asia. It was thru his prudent teaching that I went on to win some godknowswhat national Chinese calligraphy competition at the age of 10, I think. I’ll have to ask my mum about that one, if she even remembers in the first place.

I couldn’t read most of the Chinese characters I wrote, but I think it’s because of such ignorance, I found the ability to concentrate on writing as an art form. 愛 was definitely one of those words you can’t forget, not even for a C-grade Chinese student.

Likewise to Run with Me, I’ll have to post the final piece only on Monday after utilizing the offices’ scanner. Meanwhile, do share your comments with me.


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